4 problems - 1 solution

5 problems actually – and you’re guaranteed to encounter them when you’re new to the fruitarian lifestyle, and everything, quite frankly, just seems like more of a hassle… For example:

THE FRUIT GLUT
In-season fruit at a bargain price – but you have to buy a crate of the stuff. Apart from the fact that your ridiculously low purchase price means that the poor struggling farmer (without whom you & I would not survive) must have been paid next to nothing for his crop, you are now stuck with more of one kind of fruit than you can possibly consume before the fruit-flies move in.

THE TIRED BANANA
Astonishing, isn’t it, just how quickly they can go from green to spotty-black ? You can only eat so many bananas a day, and you’ll be d—d if you let them go to waste – especially if they’re organic (which I HIGHLY recommend) and came with an obscene mark-up.

THE VICIOUS PINEAPPLE
Picked too green, burning a hole in your tongue – now what do you do with the rest of the pineapple ?

THE SWEET TOOTH
Whether in the form of a whiny child, depressed adult, or well-fed guest still looking around expectantly for dessert… There will be times when you’d really like to have an alternative to the guilt-ridden ice-cream tub cave-in - especially if said child, adult or guest is diabetic, hypoglycemic, arthritic, overweight, or otherwise sugar-intolerant.

THE "I NEED SOMETHING" MOMENT
Make no mistake, you’re going to deserve a culinary reward from time to time. The usual socially entrenched artery-clogging riches won’t do it for you anymore. But you might still find yourself – from time to time – standing in the kitchen and pondering that most existential of dilemmas: Now what can I eat now ?

5 nuisances, with a single, utterly delicious solution – Eskom permitting.

Here’s how: Freeze your excess in-season fruit; ditto with ripe bananas (chunky slices). Make up your own combinations of (frozen & fresh) fruit including when necessary that bitey pineapple, always using bananas as your base (frozen bananas somehow give a better ice-creamy texture than unfrozen bananas – and here “organic” really makes a difference); whip up the whole lot with good (no preservatives / additives) coconut cream in a food processor. Heaven. All fruit, no sugar, always available, and excess again freezable.

There is simply no end to the combinations you could try. One memorable short-notice dinner party success: frozen bananas (lots), nastily sharp pineapple, lime, coconut cream and fresh organic vanilla.

Yes, yes I know – ideally the fruitarian should only eat fresh, unfrozen fruit. Directly off the perfectly healthy tree, perfectly ripened ON the tree. Like Kyloe’s persimmons, and wild mulberries, and grapes, and nectar-sweet purple plums, and golden greengages, and juicy round-flavoured satsumas, oranges & grapefruits… Well, we’re trying, but Eden is still a long way off, and in the meantime the freezer is my ally.

But there is one, much bigger difficulty every new fruitarian will face. And this one can derail you completely. That’s for next time.